Sexy-Disturbed-Sparkly-Vampire Man

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Sexy-Disturbed-Sparkly-Vampire Man is a tormented creature of the night created by Jeanne Morningstar. See also the rest of the Very-Disturbed-Scary-Creature Man legacy.
Alter Ego: Unknown
Aliases: The Angst-Ridden Avenger
Primary Writer: None
Status: Active scourge of the night in the Netropolis of Earth-20
Usability: General Use


Once, he was the sidekick of Chromium Age Very-Disturbed-Scary-Creature Man. Then he took up the Mantle of Hades and become his own net.hero, the scourge of Netropolis's nights. Along the way, he had a complex and tormented (naturally) relationship with Professor Penumbra.

When he was first seen in the Spoon of Destiny Saga, he was in a bad way, cavalierly killing and torturing criminals and snarling at everyone. One of the Ghosts of Christmas appeared to SDSVM in 2015 and try to get him to rethink his life and open up to people more, but it didn't take.

Eventually he fell into a depression so deep he didn't leave his coffin for years. Kid Revenant, following the subconscious influence of Golden Age Very-Disturbed-Scary-Creature Man, pulled him out and convinced him to take another shot at being a hero, truly honoring the VDSCM legacy. And... he's getting there.


Originally, kind of a maniac. He used to be a tremendous and frankly murderous jerk, always snarling, but has softened somewhat due to the influence of his sidekick. (Now where have we heard that before...)

Post-recovery, his personality has gotten a bit loopier and Silver Age-ier. He adopted a code against killing and drinks only animal blood, and is attempting to become something more of a detective. However, he's still pretty repressed and prone to going off into angst-fugues.

Constantly writes angsty poetic narration in his journal, or narrates things to himself he would write in his journal if he weren't in mid-fight.

Powers and Abilities

Sexy-Disturbed-Sparkly-Vampire Man has a set of largely undefined vampiric powers, including the ability to cloud men's minds. He's highly trained in hand-to-hand combat, and is highly skilled at crimefighting in general. He aspires to become a detective, and is kind of getting better at it.

He has an Angstcave full of carefully-labeled gadgets, including the Clue Analyzer Machine (which is always breaking), the Sparklegyro and the Angstmobile. He fights using Sparklerangs and Sparkleropes. He also has the Sparkle-Signal, which Professor Penumbra built for him; it goes off whenever someone's in danger and the cops and authorities ignore it.


He is subject to vampire weaknesses, including not being able to enter a house unless invited by its owner.


Wears a dark costume that would blend into the shadows if it weren't covered in sparkles; this includes a flowing black cape with light gray silhouettes of mythological monsters embroidered on it (the Mantle of Pluto), passed down from (and haunted by) Golden Age Very-Disturbed-Scary-Creature Man (but he added the sparkles himself). Very pretty. Has a nice butt.


Had a confusing and ambiguous relationship with Professor Penumbra in the past, which ended badly.

The Trivial Pursuer aspires to be his kismesis.

Kid Revenant is his sidekick, who tries to keep his head screwed on straight.


SDSVM was originally a parody of the Batman of Christopher Nolan's movies, with elements of the Golden Age version and Edward Cullen from Twilight mixed in. Ten years later, the prophecy came true when Robert Pattinson was cast as Batman, so SDSVM absorbed elements of that version, along with a bunch of the Silver Age Batman, especially the version played on TV by Adam West.