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Ven-Dorr is a morally ambiguous spy and hacker who happens to be a soda machine created by Dave Van Domelen.
Alter Ego: N/A
Aliases: Vendorr, Fanta Source
Primary Writer: None
Status: Free agent in the Classic Looniverse
Usability: Not Reserved


When the extradimensional villain Doublecross took over alt.comics.lnh[1], the energies released by the reality-warping battle between him and the Raiders, flowing through the magical conduit of blood spilled in Ultimate Ninja's battle with a group of renegade ninja, brought a soda machine in LNHQ to life.[2] When it was replaced by a Slurpee machine, it declared vengeance on the Legion, becoming – Ven-Dorr, The Soda Machine That Walked, er, Rolled Like a Man!

Hiding itself in the depths of the LNHQ, it built an army of Dalek-like minions, the VeMites, which planned to force the entire world to drink soft drinks! Together they destroyed the hated Slurpee machine and transformed LNHers into caffeine zombies. They then battled aLLiterative Lass and Occultism Kid in a pretty blatant Doctor Who parody, and the VeMites were destroyed.

Shortly afterwards, Ven-Dorr sent an email to Ultimate Ninja telling him he wanted to join the LNH! The Ninja was nonplussed, but needed someone to infiltrate the headquarters of the Dunce Circle and so sent Ven-Dorr to do it.

After this, Ven-Dorr was ignored by writers and LNHers alike, but continued to sit in the LNHQ and plot its revenge. When Mister Paprika developed a new energy drink, Pap, which turned out to kill people who drank it, Ven-Dorr was recruited as the new mascot of Pap: The Energy Drink So Extreme It Kills You, and soon became Major Foods Corp's majority shareholder. It replaced Pap's former spokesman Master Blaster, who defeated Ven-Dorr and its VeMites before it could sell Oreo Oblivion: The Energy Drink that Kills Everyone.[3]

After the West Coast Brotherhood of Net.Villains became part of the Trans-Pacific Plunderbund, they rebuilt Ven-Dorr and sent him to LNHQ to spy on the Legion. Unfortunately for Ven-Dorr, this resulted in being turned into a giant, out-of-control mechanical monster multiple times as part of the schemes of UltraKiwi Wondersock, eventually being absorbed into DeltaKiwi Megantereon. After being released, he decided to quit the Brotherhood and go back to being a morally ambiguous wildcard.


Strongly vengeance-driven. Has bouts of world-conquering, even omnicidal megalomania in between its more antiheroic phases. (It might be speculated that this is due to the contrasting influence of the two antagonists that shaped its creation – Doublecross on the one hand, and the ninja on the other.)

Powers and Abilities

Can fire soda cans at high speed, cans which he gets from the Saneez Dimension. Any flavor is possible, and even some of the more toxic ones, which he sprays in liquid form. His power cord can be used as a manipulator limb to grab things, or as a whip. He can also plug into a socket to get a boost of energy. He rolls along at high speed, but, like Daleks, has trouble with stairs.

At some points, has an army of identical but smaller minions, the VeMites, who shout "Re-Caffeinate! Re-Caffeinate!" They could mind control people by shooting soda at them.

During Ven-Dorr's brief time working for the LNH, Ultimate Ninja had wReamhack whip up an attachment to his dollar changer slot in the shape of a diskette (both 5.25 and 3.5 inch sizes, natch), which allowed Ven-Dorr to hook up with a computer.


A brownish-red soda machine by default, he has the ability to disguise himself as any type of soda machine.



  1. See Paper Tigers for more!
  2. In LetterinG MaN #6, Occultism Kid said that Ven-Dorr "was brought to sentience through a mystic convergence of the spheres of RreN-dov." You'd have to ask him what this means.
  3. The events of this story were pretty much the peak of 2000s-era edgelord humor on RACC, to an extent that WikiBoy questioned whether this story happened at the end. Still, something like it likely did in broad strokes.